gina. the last song.
life equates to happy, sad, pain. and perhaps even more.
October 26, 2011
hypocrite.
hopefully no one sees this since everyone is only stuck to fb, twitter and tumblr.
i officially declare myself as a hypocrite.
why.
because my life is a drama, and i am the actress.
sometimes, i can't differenciate between whether i am really feeling that way, or am i just putting up a show?
if that's true, then who's the show for when i'm alone? for myself?
how pathetic, a show for myself.
tsk.
i don't even know if this blog post of doubting myself is real.
as in, is it another show?
i don't know.
how do you determine genuine feelings?
by tears, smiles, frowns?
tsk.
what if i'm such an awesome actress who does all these perfectly.
but inside, i feel nothing.
haha. seriously, i don't know.
simply speaking, i don't know whether i am real or fake.
i think i lost myself.
what a joke.
do i really feel that way or do i force myself to feel that way.
what a scary person i am.
this post.
what's my motive.
sometimes, i feel like there's two people struggling inside of me.
the inner self gives out order,
and the outer self follows.
like a robot.
tsk.
this post maybe just another part of my act.
for what.
again, i don't know.
i don't know how to trust myself anymore.
every single move i make can be fake.
the gina i know is just a actress living her life according to the script she wrote.
disgusting isn't it.
come on man.
i don't even know whether i am truely feeling disgusted or just acting like i feel disgusted.
this self-doubt thing maybe just a show too.
scary.
hypocrite.
finish the song- gina.
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